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Oscars 2016 Blog – Winners Updated LIVE!

It’s that time of year again, folks, when Hollywood gets together, gets all gussied up, and tries to pretend the biggest movies of the year aren’t as good as the more “important” movies. (Look, we all know Star Wars: The Force Awakens should have been nominated for Best Picture, right? It’s way better than Avatar.) It’s the Academy Awards! And several really awesome nerdy movies did make it to awards season in style, including Mad Max: Fury Road, Ex Machina, The Martian and, yes, Star Wars in some of the technical categories, along with a host of other truly excellent movies.

Chris Rock is hosting the ceremony which begins at 8:30pm ET/5:30pm PT, following about a million hours of pre-show and red carpet shenanigans. You can follow along on Twitter as we’re going to be live-tweeting the ceremony, giving our two-cents on the winners, the snubs, and the flubs. Oh boy, can’t wait for those flubs. I’ll also be here updating the winners live as they’re announced. Possibly also giving my opinion on said winnings, because my opinions the most important, I guess (it’s not).

Below are the nominees. As the winners are announced, they’ll be put in BOLD, and I’ll add my commentary underneath in Italics. Make sense? Let’s get to it!

A pretty excellent montage, showcasing a lot of movies that should have gotten more nominations than they did.

This Chris Rock monologue is legitimately edgy. He’s pulling zero punches. It’s super funny, but damn, I’m surprised the Academy is letting him do this.

Bridge of Spies
Ex Machina
Inside Out
Straight Outta Compton
As much as I’d love for Garland or the Pixar folks to win, Spotlight was a damn good movie, truly excellent. And good speeches from Josh and Tom.

The Big Short
The Martian
Wow. Literally every other one of those scripts was, in my opinion, way better. Did they confuse the MOST writing for the BEST writing?

Putting black actors in super white movies is pretty amazing. Leslie Jones is a better actor than Leo or that bear. Tracy Morgan was great. Chris Rock in The Martian, less so.

Umm, that Stacey Dash bit landed like the heaviest of heavy balloons.

After a very strange bit from Sarah Silverman, Sam Smith sang “Writing’s on the Wall,” one of the suckiest Bond songs ever.

Jennifer Jason Leigh, The Hateful Eight
Rooney Mara, Carol
Rachel McAdams, Spotlight
Alicia Vikander, The Danish Girl
Kate Winslet, Steve Jobs
She was the odds-on favorite, but she was truly great in an otherwise overwrought movie. I’m gonna pretend she won for Ex Machina.

The Danish Girl
Mad Max: Fury Road, Jenny Beavan
The Revenant
All the nominees were deserving, but damn if Ms. Beavan didn’t create a brilliant landscape of clothes and garments. Perfect. What another lovely day indeed. Also, what a weird and cool lady.

Bridge of Spies
The Danish Girl
Mad Max: Fury Road, Colin Gibson & Lisa Thompson
The Martian
The Revenant
I mean, how can you get more perfect in terms of art direction than this movie? Well deserved indeed, also MORE MAD MAX.

Mad Max: Fury Road
The 100-Year-Old Man Who Climbed out the Window and Disappeared
The Revenant
The trifecta! Good for them! It was a gorgeous movie on all fronts. Plus, Immortan Joe’s makeup and hair alone deserved the award.

The Hateful Eight
Mad Max: Fury Road
The Revenant, Emmanuel Lubezki
Boring movie, boring choice. Yeah, it looked pretty, but what story was it telling?

The Big Short
Mad Max: Fury Road, Margaret Sixel
The Revenant
Star Wars: The Force Awakens
YES! Absolutely deserved. That movie’s pacing is the entire reason it works. Ms. Sixel is a classy lady. Good choice of playing off music, too.

Mad Max: Fury Road, Mark Mangini & David White
The Martian
The Revenant
Star Wars: The Force Awakens
I mean, I’m sensing a theme here. It’s kicking ass and I love it. BUT YOU GUYS THE SOUND WENT OUT WHEN THEY WERE TALKING HAHAHAHAH

Bridge of Spies
Mad Max: Fury Road, Chris Jenkins, Gregg Rudloff, & Ben Osmo
The Martian
The Revenant
Star Wars: The Force Awakens
Yeah, you guys, this movie is great.

Ex Machina
Mad Max: Fury Road
The Martian
The Revenant
Star Wars: The Force Awakens
Huge surprise! Ex Machina’s effects were far subtler than the others, and maybe that’s why it won. Loved this movie and loved the effects.

Maybe it’s just me, but for ME, seeing droids on stage is the greatest thing I could imagine.

My pizza arrived, so it’s really great now.

Bear Story
Sanjay’s Super Team
We Can’t Live without Cosmos
World of Tomorrow
I was pulling for Don Hertzfeldt myself, but it’s cool. I didn’t see this short. Congratulations. Sorry the Minions had to present it to you.

Boy and the World
Inside Out
Shaun the Sheep Movie
When Marnie Was There
Absolutely obvious choice, but legitimately Inside Out was a gorgeous, life-affirming, and wonderful movie. I just love those Pixar guys. And 100% agree with their sentiments. Feel your feelings, but channel it through creativity. Love them.

This is the first moment I’ve ever known who The Weeknd is. Thought it was a band. Also, this song is better than the Bond song but no less forgettable.

Chris Rock’s bits this year have been hit and miss, but this talking to people in Compton about the Oscars is pretty great. I love that nobody’s heard of Bridge of Spies.

Christian Bale, The Big Short
Tom Hardy, The Revenant
Mark Ruffalo, Spotlight
Mark Rylance, Bridge of Spies
Sylvester Stallone, Creed
Huge surprise for me, but Rylance was truly terrific, and he is a LEGENDARY actor on the stage. Classy, classy guy.

Louis C.K. is my favorite so far.

Body Team 12
Chau, beyond the Lines
Claude Lanzmann: Spectres of the Shoah
A Girl in the River: The Price of Forgiveness
Last Day of Freedom
Whoa, Sharmeen Obaid-Chinoy has won already. “This is what happens when determined women get together.” Always leave it to documentary short directors to have something substantive to say. And it changed the government. Congratulations!

Cartel Land
The Look of Silence
What Happened, Miss Simone?
Winter on Fire: Ukraine’s Fight for Freedom
This is one of the saddest and most powerful movies I saw last year. Same guy who made Senna, another touching look at a star’s life cut short. Wonderful film.

This is a painfully unfunny show overall. Kevin Hart and Louis C.K. next year.

Oh good, the payoff for this hilarious Girl Scout Cookies bit.

Clips from the Governors Awards. Neat.

Oh yeah, this is still just an industry awards. As important as the dinners they throw people who sold the most Xerox machines.

Really moving In Memoriam. We lost a lot of amazing people this year. Nice job, Mr. Grohl also.

Ave Maria
Day One
Everything Will Be Okay (Alles Wird Gut)
First, how great were Jacob and Abraham? Those kids are amazing. I didn’t see Stutterer, but any time Irish people win, I have cultural pride.

Embrace of the Serpent
Son of Saul
A War
One of the best films of the year, regardless of language. Laszlo Nemes is genuinely moved and nervous. Congratulations.

Joe Biden’s speech was really moving and the sentiment is completely accurate.

Lady Gaga’s got more passion in her performance than six thousand Sam Smiths. Damn, lady.

Bridge of Spies
The Hateful Eight
Star Wars: The Force Awakens
By far, my favorite composer of film of all time is Ennio Morricone. His music has been integral to films for the past 70 years. The Hateful Eight is a gorgeous composition. And he’s a classy, classy man for acknowledging his colleague John Williams. I’m so pleased right now.

“Earned It,” Fifty Shades of Grey
“Manta Ray,” Racing Extinction
“Simple Song #3,” Youth
“Til It Happens To You,” The Hunting Ground
“Writing’s On The Wall,” Spectre
Not nearly as good as the Adele song from a couple of years ago, and after that Lady Gaga performance, I was pulling for her. But a classy move dedicating to the whole gay community. I ain’t mad at Sam. Just a boring song.

Adam McKay, The Big Short
George Miller, Mad Max: Fury Road
Alejandro G. Inarritu, The Revenant
Lenny Abrahamson, Room
Tom McCarthy, Spotlight
My least favorite nominee by a LONG WAY. I found myself falling asleep during this movie which I didn’t from anyone else. Not pleased.

Cate Blanchett, Carol
Brie Larson, Room
Jennifer Lawrence, Joy
Charlotte Rampling, 45 Years
Saoirse Ronan, Brooklyn
Room was a truly wonderful movie and Larson’s performance was revelatory. It’s not an easy movie, and she’s not an easy character to like, but you 100% buy the love she has for that boy, and the love he has for her. Absolutely deserved.

Only two left!

They keep using Bond songs as play-off songs and they’re all about a billion times better than the one that won.

Bryan Cranston, Trumbo
Matt Damon, The Martian
Leonardo DiCaprio, The Revenant
Michael Fassbender, Steve Jobs
Eddie Redmayne, The Danish Girl
This is, I think we can all agree, an “it’s about time” award. Leo deserved an Oscar for a lot of roles, even ones he wasn’t nominated for. He was not bad at all in The Revenant. I ain’t mad at Leo at all. Just not his best. Makes perfect sense that he is as environmental as he is, and it’s a damn good speech. Good on ya, Leo (but the Revenant sucks).

The Big Short
Bridge of Spies
Mad Max: Fury Road
The Martian
The Revenant
I thought for sure after the director and cinematographer awards we’d absolutely be getting a Revenant Best Picture, but nope! Spotlight is a truly great movie, a movie about the importance of journalism at its best and people choosing to make a difference. Also, Michael Keaton was in two straight Best Picture winners… good on you, Mr. K.

And there we have it, friends! Thanks for following along with me and putting up with my rambling Revenant hatred. See ya all next year, and let’s go watch some movies. #Deadpool2017


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Image: Warner Bros, Plan B, A24, 20th Century Fox

Kyle Anderson is the Weekend Editor and a film and TV critic for Follow him on Twitter!

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