Belly bustin’ makes me feel good! Remarkably, for a country that boasts some of the longest lifespans in the world, the Japanese seem intent on outdoing even the United States when it comes to really over-the-top, fat-laden foodstuffs. And Ghostbusters as a property is actually a perfect match for this kind of one-upmanship. Like Ray Stantz imagining the Stay-Puft marshmallow man could never hurt him, only to find that notion challenged by a skyscraper-sized version, we think of cheeseburgers as simple comfort food, only to to be confronted by gigantic variants that are freakin’ challenging to finish.

Rather hilariously, with the exception of a slime-inspired dessert containing what appears to be Kiwi fruit, green tortilla chips and tiny candy hamburgers, all these items are Ghostbusters-based in the most superficial way. They are literally trying to recreate the movie logo more than anything, approximating a black background, red circles, and something white without a fixed form. The black buns use anchovy paste and olives to get their color, but we’re not entirely sure what else is involved. Is that cream cheese? Pure cream? That marshmallow dessert burger has Oreos and raisins and some kind of fruit puree, but the black topping on those potato-chip nachos is allegedly dyed chili. (They missed an opportunity for ghost pepper sauce.) We’re somewhat taking Grub Street’s word for it, as they seem to have understood the original Japanese better than Google translator.

If you’re in Japan, you can find these–and some special edition merchandise–at J.S. Burgers Cafe, from July through September. Just avoid Walter Peck afterwards; we suspect you might make an “unauthorized carbon emission” or two.

Check out all the items in our mini-gallery below, then let us know in comments if you ain’t afraid of no burger.

Images: J.S. Burgers Cafe