This is a film fan’s dream come true: Film Crit Hulk, the syntax-smashing yet surprisingly erudite film critic from Badass Digest has authored an e-book, entitled Screenwriting 101. The book is the first outing for the new publishing arm of Badass Digest, furthering a goal they’ve had of producing longer content for their readers.

For the first one out of the box, the Digest is pulling no inordinately large, green punches; they’ve recruited none other than Cornetto Trilogy and upcoming Ant-Man director Edgar Wright to pen the intro to Screenwriting 101, and we have the EXCLUSIVE premiere of that intro below! Enjoy!

HULK MUSE. HULK PONDER. HULK BEAUTIFULLY ARTICULATE THE JOY OF CINEMA.

You won’t like him when he’s angry, but you will love him when he’s passionate.

Film Crit Hulk makes all other cinematic commentary look very puny indeed. Marvel as he pounds the CAPS LOCK button to properly expound his love for cinema. Imagine Pauline Kael caught in a gamma bomb blast and you will realise that in the desert of cinematic connoisseurs, Film Crit Hulk is the strongest one there is!

In 1962, there once was a puny scientist with no love of the movie or regard for critical theory of cinematic arts. Then one fateful day, this non-cineaste was hit with massive amounts of radiation and transformed into a lumbering beast with superhuman strength, great invulnerability, but also with a newfound appreciation for classic storytelling, spatial awareness and genres of all form.

This writer of this book may only transform into the brutish green goliath in the dark of the movie theatre. His change into a passionate mass of movie loving can only be triggered by the release of adrenaline when intensely engaged or enraged by the images before him. The green goliath of the movie theatre possesses none of his human counterparts’ snobbiness, making him the ideal creature to appreciate the highs and lows of cinema. Hulk will feast on the studio popcorn and arthouse carrot cake with the same voracious appetite. Just do not talk during the feature presentation or dare check your iPhone at any point, for you may be swatted into the parking lot.

Film Crit Hulk bats away other movie buffs with their endless lists they think constitute as articles, and brings the essay back to roaring life. Why would you want to read other literature about cinema with its simple use of uppercase and lowercase characters? Film Crit Hulk knows that a true love of cinema CAN ONLY BE FULLY EXPRESSED WHEN USING THE CAPS LOCK BUTTON.

WHY READ SMALL-MINDED FILM CRITICISM WHEN YOU CAN STAND IN AWE OF HULK’S GARGANTUAN LOVE OF THE MOVIES.

I give this book two Hulk Hands up. WAY UP.

Edgar Wright, 2013

The book, Screenwriting 101 is available now on iBooks and from Amazon.