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Episode 44: You Made It Weird
Dana Gould

You Made It Weird #44: Dana Gould

DANA GOULD! (The Simpsons, comedy) comes in to make it oh so delightful. A Simpsons writer who’s not afraid to talk about his favorite Simpsons quotes, you can imagine Pete enjoyed that. A lot. And we talk about getting kicked in the professional balls, sex, God, kids, comedy, fun, and laughs. GET INTO IT, WEIRDOS!

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  1. Mr. Merle says:

    So Dana started writing about five years after I tuned out? It’s too bad that the Groening merchandise mill took one of the more spontaneously funny people of the last 30 years and forced him into episodes 300-430. It’s telling that the quote-mining (like the voice actors’ remembrances during Inside the Actors Studio) was largely from the first eight seasons.

  2. ShawnG says:

    I love Dana Gould (and of course giant Val Kilmer). All that was missing was a Hewell Hauser bit. #adamcarolla

    It was great to hear more from the personal side of Dana and I am always amazed at how Pete can make EVERY story come back to him. I <3 Pete.

    I never get tired of Boston accents; one of my favorite parts of the Bill Burr ep too.

  3. setlasmon says:

    Pete! I like your show. the Aceman brought me here and im staying!

    gonna have to check out your ‘cast with the lovely Allison Rosen as well.

    anyhoo, im not here to make long winded statements, fundamentalist or otherwise or to be a huge dick (cough JIM cough)

    but as a Mitch-Hedberg-ian it bothered me a bit that you and Dana gave Chris Rock high praise for the waiter/chef comment when I think it is highly reminscent of:

    “When you’re in Hollywood and you’re a comedian, everybody wants you to do things besides comedy. They say, ‘OK, you’re a stand-up comedian — can you act? Can you write? Write us a script?’… It’s as though if I were a cook and I worked my ass off to become a good cook, they said, ‘All right, you’re a cook — can you farm?'”

    but I aint mad at Chris, or you. just wanted to pitch some Mitch and give some kudos. cheeers!

    Solid Gould! love it. yall are great.

  4. Jon C. Forisha says:

    I’m not entirely sure, but I think Jim’s being sarcastic. It really sucks that someone’s forcing him to listen to these free podcasts that he doesn’t enjoy.

    I loved it, Pete, as always. Stay weird, you giant Val Kilmer.

  5. Man Wall says:

    Dana Gould is a fascinating guy, I feel like he isn’t as “well adjusted” as he might let on. Great interview.

  6. Jim says:

    Oh goody. Fairly early on, we were treated to some insane transphobia, then talked about why “faggot” and “retard” aren’t appropriate (because gays and the mentally handicapped are REAL people, wheras the transgendered are somehow too horrible to even address).

    Then, as always, we got to end with some unsupported claims about atheism and borderline slander against atheists. Oh, and let’s not forget about the always-laughable half-baked philosophy that Pete agrees with because it feels good (and we all know that wanting something to be true automatically makes it true).

  7. Kash says:

    Get Katherine a microphone! She is this mysterious empty person, but she must be really great and sweet based on how cool you are with her. During this episode you asked her about something and the mic didn’t pick up her voice. It will only help your show, promise. Nerds will develop crushes on her, etc.

  8. abe says:

    makes me miss last month, catching you guys within a week of each other here. and that’s probably my favorite episode of seinfeld (that, or the kenny rogers roasters one).

    that van’s a-rockin’, don’t go a-knockin’.

  9. Elizabeth says:

    Aw Josh’s nice/kind comment takes some of the fun out of being sassy and cunty in my previous comment. haha

    (not being sarcastic)

  10. Elizabeth says:

    Ultra annoying? sure fine.

    Fundamentalist? What is fundamentalist about my comment? You and I both probably remember reading the enshrined atheist texts about dogs and swimming pool computers, every atheist just preaches the same old dog-computer-pool thing I wrote, it just FINALLY was relevant to what someone had said previously, but it was one of our dogmatic texts for hundreds of years before that.

    My comment is counter arguing (an argument from the podcast) in the realm of philosophy, you are free to counter argue my comment and I can’t claim that I am correct by solely being backed by a text that is unchanging even in the face of contradictory evidence.

    People are using fundamentalist when they mean to say dick, asshole or (atheist name) sucks. All of these? sure, strut, work it gurl. Unlike atheists though, you “elizabeth sucks” are delightful!

    Also since anything apparently can be fundamentalist, I am starting the category of fundamentalist “there is something”ers, or fundamentalist “atheists-are-fundamentalists” believers. My sucking is acting up, can’t be helped, not feeling it 😉

  11. Josh says:

    Hey! No weirdo-on-weirdo hating! I affirm you, Elizabeth!

    Okay that was weird.

  12. elizabeth sucks says:

    Thanks for proving Dana’s point about the ultra annoying fundamentalist atheist.

  13. Elizabeth says:

    I just want to clarify and state more simply because my last comment was too long.

    If something is incomprehensible (like a computer to a dog) then the dog (or us) cannot even begin to have anywhere close to correct idea of what it is. We can’t even begin to say that it is something that in anyway resembles an idea of a god. (A dog’s belief that a computer is a swimming pool is useless).

    The best we can say is we don’t know what that is or what that phenomenon is. Atheists say “we don’t know” or “we don’t know yet” about many things.

  14. Elizabeth says:

    Fundamentalist atheists? really?

    Dana Gould said, “Why are we automatically the highest level of being?”

    Dawkins has said that there could be aliens so evolved that they seem god-like to us. Who are some prominent atheists that claim we are automatically the most evolved or highest level of being?

    Dana said atheists act like there’s nothing that humans can’t perceive or know. Atheists constantly say there are many things they don’t know but they don’t label those things as god. In the past when even more things were unknown (and in fact incomprehensible to many people of the time the answer would almost always be that it was god, god was pulling the sun across the sky with a chariot etc). Atheists do not claim they know everything, they have various theories about how the universe came to be (e.g. big bang theories, multiverse theories etc).

    In the analogy with the dog, the analogy to believing in god would be the dog can’t comprehend the computer but insists that the computer is e.g. a swimming pool or a doughnut and the atheist dog insists that it either is not a pool or a doughnut or that the other dog hasn’t provided any proof that it is a swimming pool or doughnut. In this analogy this atheist dog doesn’t insist there is nothing in the room (no computer) just as atheists are not saying there is no bizarre crazy possibly inconceivable universe out there they are saying you haven’t even come close to being able to say that what is out there is god (i.e. swimming pool doughnut computer).

    People like Dana say there could be SOMETHING so they can act like atheists are supremely rigid. Well if you go vague enough where the universe itself is “god” atheists don’t say there is no universe, no forces in the universe. But when they say “something” they still basically mean the same conscious overseeing god (but maybe without the bible stories). They accuse atheists of saying that there is nothing humans can’t conceive of but they are in fact conceiving of something pretty specific (although they want to pretend it could mean anything).

    They are conceiving of a conscious overseeing god where their conception could be just as wrong as insisting the computer is a swimming pool and then getting angry that atheists don’t believe there could be “SOMETHING”. If you truly mean something as a large variety of unknowns then you can’t show that atheists don’t believe there could be something because they constantly have theories about unknowns, and black holes, and other dimensions (that aren’t necessarily correct they are theories that are attempting to best explain observed phenomenon just like the original theories that the earth actually rotates around the sun were attempting to most accurately represent the observed environment around us).

  15. Liam says:

    Celebrity Bowling with The Walking Dead cast! Super excited about that

    Aside from that, great episode, I was laughing all the way through. For someone so funny Dana Gould is surprisingly well-adjusted

  16. Kevin says:

    Favorite part so far is what Pete says after mentioning Mr. Plow: “you both don’t drink? how do you guys unwind? Plow? (laughs)”

  17. Pete dreams says:


    Maybe it’s not wanting to be defined in terms of white people? E.g. white people aren’t usually called non-black as their descriptor? This might not be it at all I don’t know, I’m just making a guess.

  18. Pete dreams says:

    When Pete said he had a dream about Todd Glass I was like omg I had a dream about Pete recently!

    I am so curious what Pete’s dream about Todd Glass was about. (I know it’s none of my business) but if I had to guess I would guess that they were having some type of argument over using the words fag or gay in a joke or they were arguing about Tracey Morgan, or in the dream Pete makes a joke that Todd gets mad at him for and then Pete gets mad at Todd because that’s not even how he meant it.

  19. Christine says:

    This is the first podcast that made me actually pee my pants with laughter. Twice. But I loved it so much I don’t care.

    Ok, seriously, where can I send the laundry bills?

  20. Respeciable says:

    How would calling someone non-white be the most offensive? If someone was offended by being called non-white wouldn’t that imply that they want to be white?

  21. Josh says:

    Pete Holmes and Dana Gould unite their streams, and together send Gozer the Gozerian back to where she came!

  22. sharon says:

    Favorite line: “Every mystery I’ve solved, I’ve solved without a pipe.”

    This episode had me rolling.

  23. Kass says:

    There was a moment when you were talking about being in a juice store discussing Tibetan monks meditating and every vegetarian left leaning bone in my body (of which, most of my body is comprised) was sad for everyone in that scene. But then you called it out! And it was wonderful. You spun me on a merry go round of emotion.

    Also, this was the first time I think I was fully on board for comedic shop talk. Very nice.

    Btw, is the accepted notion that God would negatively haunt you a NE/Catholic thing? Or is that a general thing that I just never got in confirmation class.

  24. Pete Holmes says:

    Thanks all!!

  25. Julia Hays says:

    This episode made me want to wreak something… not havoc:-)

  26. fiber says:

    Two weeks in a row of Pete talking about blood rushing into a dick! Let’s shoot for a turkey!

  27. S says:

    This episode was hilarious. Great stuff.

    Pete, you MUST create a TV show that centers around your struggle to understand religion. Just think of all the glorious, painfully awkward “confession” scenes (obviously the priest would be played by a bewildered Ray Romano).

  28. highwyre237 says:

    Pete, not many people can keep 2 hour convos this entertaining multiple times a week. Another great show, thanks for passing time in my cube on a friday

  29. highwyre237 says:

    Pete, not many people can keep 2 hour convos this interesting multiple times a week. Another great show, thanks for passing time in my cube on a friday

  30. jimjim says:

    solid gould. loved the simpsons talk so much. are there any podcasts devoted to the simpsons, where each guest worked for the simpsons in some capacity?

    thanks pete and dana, a really great conversation to listen to. pete it was funny when you were beginning to talk about how bathrooms are “gross”, and then dana interrupted with a remark about a hot nerd girl, and then you were like “that’s gross”