The struggle is real for the sons of King Ragnar—and if you’re watching this without prior knowledge of the last episode, then welcome to the struggle! Kindly note the heavy spoiler alert and shut it!

The Gods of Asgard have abandoned you, Ragnar. (Some strong Kratos vibes rolling off of Ragnar this season.) That Norse lesson in retribution and guilt which poured over into season four is coming full circle. All the treasures Ragnar gained from his raids are gone. His ultimate vision for conquest is gone.

The citizens of Kattegat—left to let the wounds of Paris fester after Ragnar up and disappeared—have also turned their backs on him. I can’t blame them—an entire generation of warriors were lost during the raid and dozens of farmers were also killed in the ill-fated Wessex colony, which Ragnar deliberately kept secret. So, yeah—a revenge tour to England with THIS GUY isn’t exactly on their RAID-ar (Does anybody remember laughter?)

Instead, Kattegat backs Björn’s more glorious, more alluring voyage to the Mediterranean. They’re setting off in Viking style with Floki’s dope new longships. (Hands-down, Floki blowing a raspberry is the best Floki!) Also, Björn’s raiding team is legit locked down with Harold Finehair and Halfdan the Black—aka the Vikings edition “Bash Brothers.” So, skÃ¥l to their voyage ahead! Bad news for the other cursed voyage though—especially after Aslaug’s horrifying vision come to life.

But going to Mediterranean isn’t without risks either. A family reunion with Uncle—I mean—Duke Rollo is imminent. If this planned “practical” arrangement doesn’t work out—another Björn vs Rollo match-up is always appreciated. My money, however, is on Rollo’s inner Viking urge to dump his dull court life and boring French family in favor for blood, guts, and glory in a new land! (Cue a very bitter Princess Gisla.)

Let’s talk Ivar—my previous statement from last episode still stands: Ivar is THE jerk of jerks, nearing Joffrey Baratheon levels. His twisted dependence on Aslaug and her blind devotion keeps creeping up, which is a nice contrast to Lagertha’s more warm but liberating bond with Björn. (Let’s put it this way—Lucille Bluth has a lot of “Motherboy” competition next to Ivar and Aslaug!)

I get it—pity is a hard thing to shake, no doubt even more so for a mother to her son. But being a man in a Viking world has come with a lot of demands of Ivar, a son of Odin, and now he’s just bursting with resentment and malice. The raid to England will either be Ivar’s moment to match his brothers’ masculinity and fated glory or it’ll be the death of him, both of which Aslaug can’t stand to deal with ATM. (Insert obligatory cliffhanger.) The history books tell Ivar’s tale with a bit more optimism and vigor, so we can’t exactly fall back on that to foresee this character’s fate just yet. For all I know, Ivar’s endgame could take a tragic turn and result in killing the one thing he holds dear the most… IF he survives.

But let’s not discredit a mother’s fierce devotion to her offspring: in order to proudly stand by her sons, Aslaug had to endured years of Ragnar’s rage and neglect, a fact that he finally admitted to and decently apologized for in this episode. Aslaug isn’t exactly perfect though. Remember a certain mystery man of mythological proportions named Harbard? Remember the happy-la-la land of Kattegat filled with procreating activities involving Harbard? Sigurd remembers. Seems that Sigurd—the lesser of young jerks—will be taking no prisoners when it comes to exacting justice amongst the family Lothbrok.

Speaking of the family—welcome to the tribe, Astrid! (Word to the wise—once you meet Björn Ironside, you’ll never favor another son of Ragnar Lothbrok again.)

I’m firmly team Astrid at this point; any romantic relationship between Lagertha and Ragnar seems like a waste of time. I mean people really love and follow her as Earl Ingstad—a benevolent but mighty shield maiden—not simply “the wife of Ragnar” like some other queens. (I’ve got your shade, Aslaug!) Prepare for battle, ladies because, sadly, this throne is only fit for one equal in Ragnar’s life—and in Valhalla, for that matter.

Next week we return to the shores of Wessex and France in episode 13, “Two Journeys.” For now, leave us with your looming Vikings comments below.

Images: The History Channel
GIF: VikingsHistory/Tumblr