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Read Original Script for THE SIMPSONS “Steamed Hams”

Anyone from Albany will tell you if you want to host an unforgettable luncheon, there’s no finer meal to serve than some good old fashioned “steamed hams.” Of course, you don’t even have to be from that one very specific part of upstate New York to know that if you’re a fan of The Simpsons, because that’s what Seymour Skinner offered up to Superintendent Chalmers in the classic episode “22 Short Films About Springfield.” And thanks to one of the writers who came up with that vignette we now have the original script, and it was hilarious from the very first draft.

Bill Oakley shared the first version of the scene on Twitter (you can click his first tweet to read the entire thread), and what’s remarkable is just how fully formed it is. If you read it before re-watching the scene you might not even notice any changes since they’re mostly cosmetic, with a few superfluous lines cleaned up, and a couple added.

https://twitter.com/thatbilloakley/status/949044048370614273

The two most noticeable changes come at the beginning and end, with the meal originally meant to be dinner instead of lunch (the aurora borealis joke is so much funnier during the day), and the final version having the incredible line from Chalmers that Skinner is an odd fellow, but he steams a good ham.

This episode originally aired on April 14th, 1996 (1996!), and it’s still just as funny as it was then. And just like when we originally saw it, now we’re craving some “steamed hams.” But don’t bother trying to order them in Utica.

Is there anything from the original script you wish made it into the scene? Tell us why in the comments below.

Featured Image: Fox

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