Either I’m having an allergic reaction to gently running my hands through stalks of wheat, or this is the wildest news to happen all day. According to a new report, Ridley Scott is developing a sequel to 2000’s Gladiator. You know, Gladiator? The story of a betrayed Roman general (Russell Crowe) whose family is murdered and then is forced to fight for his freedom in gladiatorial fighting pits? Yes, that Gladiator.  Scott apparently wants to direct the film and has tapped The Town and Hunger Games Peter Craig to bring it to life. No, this isn’t an elaborate prank (as far as I can tell). It’s not a joke. It’s a real movie that is really happening. For real.

So how exactly do you continue a story in which the main character–spoiler alert–dies at the end? According to Deadline, Ridley Scott plans to follow up Gladiator and its five Academy Awards with a story about Lucius, the son of Lucilla (Connie Nielsen) and the nephew of the murderous and conniving Commodus (Joaquin Phoenix). While avenging the deaths of his own family, Maximus saved both Lucius and Lucilla, and apparently left quite the impression on the youth. Perhaps enough of an impression to inspire Lucius to someday extend his arms and shout to a crowd of people, “Are you not entertained all over again?”

This isn’t the first time that a Gladiator sequel has been in the works. At the request of his close, personal friend Russell Crowe, Australian musician Nick Cave of Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds fame penned a sequel screenplay for the acclaimed film. Tentatively subtitled Christ Killer, Cave’s script featured deceased warrior Maximus Decimus Meridius sent back to Earth by the Roman gods to murder Jesus Christ and his followers, who are stealing popularity from the old gods. What follows is Maximus becoming a weird immortal warrior who winds up fighting in basically every major conflict over the ages, including World War I, World War II, and Vietnam before an epic finale at the Pentagon. Forget what you think you want, Ridley Scott; I will have this script made into a movie in this life or the next.

We’ll report more on this story as it develops. In the meantime, let us know what you’d like to see from a Gladiator sequel in the comments below.

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Images: DreamWorks