Oh what a varied web we weave, friends and television lovers alike. This is Thursday’s TV-Cap and let me tell you, it is not messing around. We’ve got something for everyone: House joining HBO’s Veep, Ceciley Strong taking over the White House Correspondents’ Dinner, Longmire‘s Netflix resurrection, and the many cancelled doings of Bill Cosby. The time to get to reading is nigh, my friends.

So let’s get to it!

Cameron’s the Queen of New York: Not only does Ms. Diaz get to host Saturday Night Live with musical guest Mark Ronson, but she also French AND German kissed Bobby Moynihan? Man this girl’s lived the BEST life. [” target=”_blank”>YouTube]

…Speaking of SNL: Ceciley Strong is going to host the White House Correspondents’ Dinner — only the 4th ever woman to do so. BOW DOWN, Y’ALL. Who needs a Weekend Update desk, y’know? [The Hollywood Reporter]

From the House-House to the White House: Praise be to everything good, Hugh Laurie is finally returning to television. And not just ANY television, Armando Iannucci-run television (which is a very enjoyable sort of TV business indeed)! That’s right, House himself is slated to join the cast of Veep‘s forthcoming fourth season. Sure all the details are unavailable — Will he recur? Star? Guest star? Pop in to bop Selena on the head on her way into the Oval? — but does it really matter? Hugh Laurie’s going to be slinging some Iannucci insults around and really that’s all anyone needs to know to be on board with this. [E! Online]

New Magical Mysteries Await: Last month we were lucky enough to sneak a peek at this a few other photos from BBC America’s newest original series, Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell, but now — thank goodness — so do the rest of you! And the whole thing looks spooky and mysterious in the best ways, amirite? Based on The New York Times bestselling novel by Susanna Clarke, the seven-part period drama follows the reclusive but seemingly magical Mr. Norrell (Eddie Marsan) heads to London in order to help the government in the war against Napoleon. There are fairies involved! It looks super stylized. Do want yes please! Click the photo to en-biggen it.

Longmire Gets Another Go: The surprisingly cancelled Longmire will not go gentle into that good night. Actually, all it’s doing is jumping ship, to Netflix, after being cancelled at its original home network, A&E. It is said that the fourth season of the show will pick up mere minutes after the third season left off (quite dramatically, at that). Victory for the good things! [Entertainment Weekly]

What Do Manhattan and Game of Thrones and Gotham Have in Common?: They’re all up for cinematography awards! [The Hollywood Reporter]

Playing Missy: Michelle Gomez was, far and away, the best part of season eight of Doctor Who. (What? It’s true!) Her portrayal of The Master being one of the best the series has ever seen. But what was it like playing such an evil mastermind — and being the first female to embody the typically male-based role? Like Hillary Clinton running for President, apparently! The actress spoke about it on a panel discussion earlier this week in the U.K. but you can watch the video of it right here, right MEOW.

Nobody’s Got Time for Bill Cosby: After weeks of controversy surrounding ol’ Cliff Huxtable regarding the many, many claims of sexual assault lain against him, everyone who has anything associated with Bill Cosby have pulled out of their arrangements. NBC’s pilot, Netflix’s comedy special (so far just “delayed”), and even TV Land’s planned marathon of The Cosby Show have all been scrapped. [BuzzFeed]

And Just Because We Love You: Please enjoy Christopher Walken’s sweet, sweet dance moves. You’re welcome.

Quick! What are some of your favorite Veep-related takedowns and/or insults? Leave ’em in the comments.