BREAKING NEWS: The Winds of Winter still ain’t here!

Release the Hound! Ring the Seven Bells! Sound the Horn of Joramun: George R.R. Martin has something to say about the latest installment of your favorite book series—but you’re probably not going to like it.

Since 2011, fans have waited oh-so-impatiently for the release of the sixth book of George R.R. Martin’s fantasy epic, A Song of Ice and Fire (better known to TV lovers as that teeny, tiny little show Game of Thrones). And each and every single year, they are disappointed and let down by the news that no, Virginia, there is no new book coming through. When the HBO iteration premiered in 2011, most people assumed it would leave Georgieboy plenty of time to get the last two purported books—The Winds of Winter and A Dream of Spring—done ahead of the series. Especially because George himself had admitted as early as 2014 that he was feeling the heat to finish the story.

Oh, what sweet summer children we were back then.

Now, don’t get it twisted: winter is HERE on Game of Thrones the TV version (ahem cough cough cough siiiigh), but as of yet, there’s nary a dream of an officially confirmed release date for TWOW, even if Amazon France alleged it to be March 9, 2017 on their site. Which, naturally, got us all PRETTY EXCITED. Because, when you’ve been receiving chapters of the book from the author himself since as early as 2011 (and you can see more about the chapters here, here, here, and here), well, you can understand why audiences would be a bit, erm, antsy to finish reading the whole dang thing.

A Storm of Chapters

Think about it—we’ve seen a lot of this book already! Back in December 2011, a Theon Greyjoy chapter was presented in a special UK iteration of A Dance with Dragons that will end up in TWOW. (Read it here.) Another Iron Island-centric bit fronted by Victarion was also read aloud during a conversation at TIFF in 2012 (it starts at 30 minutes in):

Though it’s not all northerners getting attention: the short-shrifted Dornish got in on the game in January 2012 that was originally intended for book five with not one but two chapters featuring Arianne Martell. You can read an archived version of the first one here, and the other on GRRM’s site.

Our men of the dragon—namely Tyrion Lannister and Ser Barristan Selmy—also have chapters available on the World of Ice and Fire app (which you can pick up via iTunes or Google Play)! First read at a convention in October 2013, the Barristan chapter also came out as a preview chapter in the US paperback edition of ADWD and a fan even narrated it in a video:

As for our Northern women—Arya and Sansa Stark—their current monikers, Mercy and Alayne, also have chapters you can read online. This Arya chapter was originally intended to be a part of “A Feast for Crows” and has shifted between books before being slotted for “Winds of Winter.” It has been archived online and is also available in the app.

A Feast of Promises

Of course, it’s not just the written teases that are terrible—it’s the promises George has doled out over the years that have also made this wait feel longer than the longest Winter on record at the Citadel. Back in 2014, GRRM insisted the book was coming in 2015. And then again in 2015 he insisted that 2016 was the year …only to come back around and say “just kidding!” on his blog. And now, in 2017, we’ve got another LiveJournal-centric update in the comments:

“Not done yet, but I’ve made progress. But not as much as I hoped a year ago, when I thought to be done by now. I think it will be out this year. (But hey, I thought the same thing last year).”

To which we say:

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I mean ok sure, don’t stop believin’ George.

In short? Don’t hold your breath. Will we get a new chapter? My money’s on yes, if for nothing else than a peace offering for a lack of winter winds in 2017—but maybe all this disbelief about his progress will make him sour on the thought like a Dornish red gone bad.

But what do you think? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below.

Image Credit: HBO

Alicia Lutes is the Managing Editor of Nerdist, creator/host of Fangirling, and the resident Khaleesi of all things Game of Thrones at Nerdist. Find her on Twitter!