Like Meryl Streep and Dustin Hoffman in Kramer vs. Kramer, Mountain Dew and Cheetos have waged a savage custody battle for our taste buds and our affections in an attempt to prove which artificially flavored pile of empty calories loves us more than the other one. Sometimes, they can pander a bit too hard to win over our fickle mouths — we’re looking at you, Mountain Dew Game Fuel. Sometimes they leave us with a dusty orange sheen that takes industrial strength carbolic soap to remove from our fingertips (and everything they may have touched).

But it’s 2014, for crying out loud. When will enough be enough? When will there be peace between corn syrup-filled soda and corn flour-enriched snack foods? The answer, according to Japan, is now, because, like a high calorie Henry Clay, they’ve made a great compromise: Mountain Dew-flavored Cheetos.

Despite how horrific and Lovecraftian of a combination this may seem, this isn’t the first time Mountain Dew has made the leap from liquid to solid. Apparently, back in 2008, there was a mystery flavor of Doritos called “Quest”, which was sold here in the US, the flavor of which bore a striking resemblance to doing the Dew. Frito-Lay Japan also rolled out Pepsi-flavored Cheetos a while back, which coated the cheesy corn puffs in a sweet cola flavor that sounds infinitely less revolting than this one.

In any event, the Mountain Dew Cheetos evidently taste similar to lemon-lime chips and evoke the soda’s sweet, fizzy taste while keeping that puffed corn texture you know and love. In I’m venturing to Japan in March, so I’ll be sure to report back then, but for those of you who want to do the Dew that cannot be undone, you can order them online for roughly $3.50 a pop. Just be sure to post in the comments what you’d like your epitaph to say in advance.

HT: Topless Robot