This is another in our favorite Sontaran, Strax (Dan Starkey)’s field reports back to the Sontaran Empire about his findings whilst on Earth and dealing with the pathetic and weak being known as “the Doctor.”

In this one, which showed up on doctorwhohub.tv, Strax takes us through all 12 (TWELVE) of the Doctor’s incarnations, including the just-revealed War Doctor, with particular emphasis on how “weak” or “cunning” they are. I mean, a Sontaran only really cares about ruthlessness and ability to win battles. As such, he has very nice things to say about the Third and Sixth Doctors, but nothing but contempt for the Second and Fourth Doctors, who use too much of that nasty, soft emotion, “compassion.”

He’s also very solemn when talking about the Eleventh Doctor, being that he spent the most amount of time with him and he’ll be dying soon. We’ll all find out how when the Doctor Who Christmas Special, entitled “The Time of the Doctor,” airs on BBC America Wednesday, December 25th, 2013, at 9/8c, following an hour-long special called “Farewell to Matt Smith,” which will do what it says on the tin.